Best Friend for Life

20141123_162814Friend­ship is a fun­ny thing. Some peo­ple come into your life and you’re fast friends, for a time. And then they’re gone. They move on, life cir­cum­stances change, new jobs, new schools or sim­ply the busi­ness of life choked out your pre­cious time togeth­er and you drift apart.

I’ve often won­dered why some peo­ple come and seem to be inter­wo­ven into the heart while oth­ers drift in and then out again as if a pleas­ant breeze car­ried them away. They grow dis­tant like a fad­ed mem­o­ry. Some, on the oth­er hand, becom­ing more like fam­i­ly than friend.

So what makes a true friend that stands the test of time? You know the ones that you can go a long time with­out speak­ing to but when you do it’s like you have nev­er been apart. You some­how draw upon the long ago estab­lished rela­tion­ship no mat­ter how much time has passed.

I think there are sev­er­al fac­tors that con­nect two peo­ple at this inti­mate lev­el that nei­ther time nor dis­tance can sep­a­rate.

The first is shared expe­ri­ence. When two peo­ple are thrown togeth­er for some expe­ri­ence that they share togeth­er it cre­ates a bridge or a bond of rela­tion­ship that often remains. That shared expe­ri­ence can be any­thing from going to school togeth­er to work­ing a job togeth­er day in and day out. It has to be some­thing that is fair­ly con­sis­tent for some time. It’s like we build bridges inside of us and each moment we spend togeth­er puts more bricks and wood into the bridge.

Sec­ond, is open­ing of the heart to each oth­er. We have to choose to let each oth­er in. Shar­ing expe­ri­ence is not enough. We have to let the oth­er per­son into our inner cir­cle. We must open the door and wel­come the oth­er per­son in. It must be mutu­al.

Third, is inten­tion. We must inten­tion­al­ly keep the friend­ship impor­tant. That can be hard to do when dis­tance sep­a­rates two friends. But not impos­si­ble.

I’ve made many friends over my life­time but few have stayed in my life. They have come and gone based on many fac­tors. Most­ly, just life. Those that have stayed were because of one fac­tor in par­tic­u­lar. Dur­ing our time togeth­er, the oth­er per­son became embed­ded in my heart.

I can count on my hand those that I am for­tu­nate to call “Best Friend.” I have one in my home­town and no mat­ter how much time goes by she is my first “Best Friend for life” and she always will be. I have been blessed with one or two “Best Friends” in every place we have lived. And we have moved a lot.

What I know is that those are pre­cious rela­tion­ships that I val­ue and am so thank­ful for.  I’ve heard it said that you only need one friend. I have found that to be true! If you have more, then you are extra blessed.

I chal­lenge you to stop and take the time, with inten­tion, and call one of your friends that you haven’t talked to in a while. Nur­ture a friend­ship today.

Leave A Response

* Denotes Required Field